No I do not want to join your farmville. I hope you get mad cow disease.

Holy fuck.

Farmville invite, after Farmville invite, after Farmville invite.

You’d think they were queuing up to me like I was the war rations provisioner. And even if I was I’d say, “Get fucked and die you drain on our society’s gene pool.”

I can’t even begin to tell you how much I loathe Farmville.

Try stopping a mutant rat, then let's talk, faggot.

Farming is boring enough in real life. I do not need this on my Facebook. I do not need to know about Sonny the horse and how he died. I do not need to know about your sheep. I do not care if you are my neighbour, I would burn your farm down and eat your sheep. I don’t care!

What we need is a Mutant Rat Ville. Or a Man-Eating Alligator Ville. Or a Ninja Assissination Ville. OR we could combine all three, and you could drive your little ninja around fucking assisinating badass mutant rats (think Splinter from Mutant Turtles but evil and man eating: “I eat pussy …literally! rrraggghhh”) while avoiding getting chomped by a run-away alligator (just after he eats your fucking sheep.)

We don’t need this in our world

The crisis in the Middle East is being exacerbated by these mentally masturbating Farmvillers. While they should be out striking agreements and not invading countries for oil, they’d rather sit in their cubicles polishing the bishop and watching their sheep, while the world goes to shit.

Don’t even get me started on the economy. All I want to say is, “Take away Farmville, and that stupid vampire-werewolf whatever-it-is and we’ll be back to growth. Bankers are all wanking away your money into Farmville and Second Life spending frenzies while you’re being defrauded and once again our world is going to shit.”

Just stop it, ok?